Abortion, Sarcasm, and Anger

I recently celebrated the happy news that my book, Cradle My Heart, Finding God’s Love After Abortion is now published! I’m just thrilled to have this capstone to eight years of work on the book–so many people worked hard and prayed with me and for me to get this project to this point. And all of us share a desire to see women walking in spiritual freedom after abortion has hurt our hearts. That is my motive and that is my prayer–that God would be glorified by the restoration of broken hearts. I want everyone to know God’s love and to follow our Lord into the healing that his presence brings. 

In contrast, I also write about abortion as a social issue and I’m still shocked and amazed at the level of sarcasm in the abortion conversation. One of the biggest benefits of healing after abortion is that your anger recedes. There are many steps in the process of moving from anger to peace after abortion, and I think one of the most important steps is embracing the loss of control. So many of my attitudes when I chose abortion and when I tried to justify it afterwards were based on a generalized anger toward things I could not control in my life. It didn’t solve anything to be angry toward people who let me down or toward my circumstances which made me feel trapped. But anger can fuel your energy and serve as a motivator. Anger can give you a sense of power and help you feel stronger than you actually are. Anger can mask the pain of the grief you don’t dare allow yourself to feel.

If you are troubled by anger today don’t be deterred and don’t give way to sarcasm. Take heart and stand in God’s grace and truth. I’m encouraged by Proverbs 12:18: “Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.” The angry rhetoric that surrounds the abortion debate can quickly slide into sarcasm. And if you are surrounded by sarcastic people–especially on this issue–think about your own thirst for wisdom, your own need for truth. This is about so much more than a battle for our rights! This is a battle for your heart, soul, and mind. Turn to the one who is Wisdom and who can comfort your hurting heart.

About Kim Ketola:
Kim Ketola is a sought-after writer and motivational speaker with the Ruth Graham and Friends conference. After thirty years in the broadcasting industry, she founded a nonprofit organization through which she presents professionally accredited conferences to equip counselors and help individuals recover from the emotional and spiritual wounds of abortion.
To enter the drawing to win a copy of Kim’s book, go here.  The winner will be contacted on Saturday by email.

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  1. Kim.. thank you so much for your post here on Grace Cafe & for using your experience to reach out to so many hurting women. I am one of them…one of the millions and millions affected by abortion loss. All those years ago & I still remember that fateful day. Everything that led to it.. everything that led from it. So much deep pain yet much more grace because of it! Anger and ache..forgiving my dad for forcing me …turned me towards my Heavenly FATHER & getting thru leads to REDEEMED! PTL!
    Isaiah 61:1-3..? Beauty from ashes. ?
    Broken yet not destroyed~ Mary

    • Mary, Thank you for your witness here. So few people understand how many girls and women are forced and have all choice removed. I love your verse from Is. 61–we are oaks of righteousness–for the display of the Lord’s splendor. God bless our broken hearts–for He has come to bind the broken hearted.

      • The part of Isaiah 61 where you just shared using the Oak of Righteousness became even more real to me again in 2003 when my late husband suicide’ed as he slammed into a tree. A very special tree…
        Our Lord keeps using that passage over & over in my life PURPOSELY!
        Kim .. God is using you & others timely & purposely to bring me more fully outward & transparently present for His Will. Thank you from this sistah heart to yours 8)
        Bee Blessed ~Mary

  2. Thank you for sharing life, hope, and a cup of coffee with us here at Grace Café, Kim. We look forward to having you back on Grace Café Radio soon. And thank you for bringing grace and truth to our Simply Grace blog. May the Lord continue to bless your ministry and the webcast this evening.

  3. Wonderful words sister. I have never had an abortion, but I’ve walked a road of other things to be able to say, “I understand” about the anger, the fuel to motivate you, and the need to avoid sarcasm. It seems, sometimes, that those feelings serve a purpose in our journey, but they aren’t good to hold onto. Thank you for sharing such a transparent part of your own journey to inspire and empower others.

    • Lisa, thanks for affirming. I really was trying to reach those who hold a pro-choice point of view who are so angry about their “rights” and trying to battle through life as a free agent. I used to live that way. I’m glad this resonates with you too.

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